...Not only did I grope him, I tickled him 'til he couldn't breathe and then four guys jumped on top of me. It's my 50th birthday.' –Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, poor guy's jumping on you-- that sounds like a--a hell of a--a shindig there... I just--very quickly-- (talking into phone) Cancel my 50th birthday.
December 25th, 1642, Julian calendar, Sir Isaac Newton is born. Jesus, on the other hand, was actually born in the summer. His birthday was moved to coincide with the traditional Pagan holiday that celebrated the Winter Solstice with lit fires and slaughtered goats. Which, frankly, sounds like more fun than 12 hours of church with my mother followed by a fruitcake. –Merry Newtonmas, everyone!