| 2007-12-31
|
 |
"What an honor it is to have you in our little home. Though I wonder if it does make the best first impression on a sensitive young mind to see you drinking during business hours."
[Rosalind Russell (Mame Dennis)
from Auntie Mame] |
|
|
(background)
"Two weeks I've been here and they've had 13 cocktail parties. –Only 13 in two weeks? –They had to call one off. The bootlegger couldn't come that day."
[Connie Gilchrist (Norah Muldoon) | uncredited
from Auntie Mame] |
| 2007-12-28
|
|
"Fuck being a hero. You know what you get for being a hero? Nothing. You get shot at. You get a little pat on the back, blah, blah, blah, atta boy. You get divorced. Your wife can't remember your last name. Your kids don't want to talk to you. You get to eat a lot of meals by yourself. Trust me, kid. Nobody wants to be that guy."
[Bruce Willis (John McClane)
from Live Free or Die Hard] |
|
|
(background)
"Listen, will you just take a minute and dig deep for a bigger set of balls, 'cause you're going to need them before we're through."
[Mary Elizabeth Winstead (Lucy)
from Live Free or Die Hard] |
| 2007-12-27
|
 |
"Well, now maybe you'd qualify as a lady wrestler."
[William Frawley (Fred Mertz)
from I Love Lucy] |
|
|
(background)
"This is probably the toughest assignment I've ever had!"
[Lucille Ball (Lucy Ricardo)
from I Love Lucy] |
| 2007-12-26
|
|
"You have no idea who I am or what I am capable of."
[Timothy Olyphant (Thomas Gabriel)
from Live Free or Die Hard] |
|
|
(background)
"This isn't cool. Don't ever, ever touch my computer."
[uncredited
from Live Free or Die Hard] |
| 2007-12-25
|
|
"(phone rings) Hello, Police. Attacked by Christmas toys? That's strange. That's the second the second toy complaint we've had."
[uncredited (Policeman)
from Nightmare Before Christmas, The] |
|
|
"There's got to be a logical way to explain this Christmas thing."
[Chris Sarandon (Jack Skellington)
from Nightmare Before Christmas, The] |
|
|
(background)
"Merry Christmas, Batman. I'm so glad you could join us."
[Mark Hamill (The Joker)
from Batman: The Animated Series] |
| 2007-12-24
|
|
"Happy Christmas, Filburt. –Christmas?! Oh, my gosh!"
[Carlos Alazraqui (Rocko) | Mr. Lawrence (Filburt Shellbache)
from Rocko's Modern Life] |
|
|
"(gasp) Oh, my gosh. It's-it's-it's elves! There's elves living in the neighborhood! I had my suspicions. If there's anything I hate more than Christmas, it's elves!"
[Charles Adler (Ed Bighead)
from Rocko's Modern Life] |
|
|
(background)
"Merry Christmas."
[Jack Webb (Sgt. Joe Friday)
from Dragnet 1967] |
| 2007-12-21
|
|
"Oh, man, it's finally here! Tomorrow's Christmas Eve! You got everything ready? –No. –You mean you haven't trimmed your stockings or hung your chestnuts or roasted the tree? –No! –Or figgified your pudding? –Donkey! Will you get it through your thick head: no one here gives a hoot about Christmas!"
[Eddie Murphy (Donkey) | Mike Myers (Shrek)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
"Yeah? Well, that's a real nice way to treat your guests on Christmas. And if you think I am going to give you a present now, you are sadly mistaken. –You want to give me a present? Then go away! That's all I wanted! –Fine! I'm going! –Good! Then go! –You go and have yourself a Merry Christmas! Ebeneezer Shrek! –And a Bah Humbug to you, too!"
[Eddie Murphy (Donkey) | Mike Myers (Shrek)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
(background)
"Now go on. I don't care about Christmas."
[Mike Myers (Shrek)
from Shrek The Halls] |
| 2007-12-20
|
|
"There's only one thing left to do. It's time to see Santa Claus."
[Jimmy Bennett (Rerun Van Pelt)
from I Want A Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown] |
|
|
"Listen to me. Mom doesn't want you to have a dog, does she? –No. –Do you really think Santa Claus is going to bring you something Mom doesn't want you to have? –Ooh. Supreme Court stuff."
[Ashley Rose Orr (Lucy Van Pelt) | Jimmy Bennett (Rerun Van Pelt)
from I Want A Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown] |
|
|
(background)
"Thank goodness Christmas vacation starts tomorrow."
[Jimmy Bennett (Rerun Van Pelt)
from I Want A Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown] |
| 2007-12-19
|
|
(background)
"I can hardly wait for Christmas, Mommy."
[Susan Olsen (Cindy Brady)
from Brady Bunch, The] |
|
|
"Daddy! Daddy! –What are you so excited about, sweetie, huh? –Santa's going to give Mommy her voice back for Christmas. –He's what? –He promised Mommy can sing on Christmas morning. –Oh, honey, how could he do that? He's not a doctor. –He's better than a doctor. He's Santa Claus."
[Susan Olsen (Cindy Brady) | Robert Reed (Mike Brady)
from Brady Bunch, The] |
|
|
"OK, it's unanimous. We'll cancel Christmas… take the tree down, take the presents back to the store… I'll throw the turkey away."
[Ann B. Davis (Alice Nelson)
from Brady Bunch, The] |
| 2007-12-18
|
|
(background)
"Well, the point is, children, there is a Santa Claus. Isn't there?"
[John Astin (Gomez Addams)
from Addams Family, The (TV)] |
|
|
"Thank you, darling. Merry Christmas. Now I must wrap some more Christmas packages!"
[Carolyn Jones (Morticia Frump Addams)
from Addams Family, The (TV)] |
|
|
"(gong) You rang? Ho ho ho."
[Ted Cassidy (Lurch)
from Addams Family, The (TV)] |
| 2007-12-17
|
|
"'Twas the night before Christmas and I spent all the day finishing up on my Christmas display. Now missing all this would be nothing but tragic. So just follow me and I'll show you the magic. Now out in the yard in a glorious clutter is a spectacle there that'll make your heart flutter. With 20-foot cheese balls and a big egg nog fountain and yodelling elves on an ambrosia mountain. A stage where acrobats jump, leap, and prance and honor the day through interpretive dance."
[Eddie Murphy (Donkey)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
"He was dressed all in fur from his head to his paws. And he stood there heroic, a real Santa… Claws. Red are his boots and so is his cape. His sword is a thing that tastes like crabcake. He wears a fine belt and a leather cravat and there is a cute, fuzzy thing which hangs down from his... hat. (purring and tapping on bell)"
[Antonio Banderas (Puss In Boots)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
(background)
"All right, everybody! If you leave now, you can beat the holiday traffic!"
[Mike Myers (Shrek)
from Shrek The Halls] |
| 2007-12-14
|
|
(background)
"Well… I-I guess it ain't such a bad Christmas after all, huh?"
[Carroll O'Connor (Archie Bunker)
from All In The Family] |
|
|
"What's the matter, Arch? You're acting like--You're acting like you've given up on Christmas this year. Well, why are you so down? Where's your Christmas spirit? –What do you mean? Who do you think hung the wreath on the door, huh? One of Santa's gnomes?"
[Rob Reiner (Michael 'Meathead' Stivic) | Carroll O'Connor (Archie Bunker)
from All In The Family] |
|
|
"Ah, I was just going to say that Ma means that we're all kowtowing to Madison Avenue and the Almighty Cash Register. Yeah. She means that Christmas has been exploited by Big Business. It's a victim of Crass Commercialism. –Oh, my. Did I mean all that?"
[Rob Reiner (Michael 'Meathead' Stivic) | Jean Stapleton (Edith Bunker)
from All In The Family] |
| 2007-12-13
|
|
"Nobody cuts down their own Christmas tree anymore. They buy plastic ones. Boy, they're really great. They, uh, spray spruce juice, ooze imitation sap, shed plastic pine needles. Boy, you never saw such an artificial mess."
[Alvy Moore (Hank Kimball)
from Green Acres] |
|
|
(background)
"This is going to be the best Christmas we've ever had. –It doesn't feel like Christmas. The radio said it was 81 degrees."
[Eddie Albert (Oliver Wendell Douglas) | Eva Gabor (Lisa Douglas)
from Green Acres] |
|
|
"These trees are a travesty on Christmas. Do you realize that all over the country farmers are going out into their own fields, chopping down their own trees, carrying them back to their own farmhouses, while in the kitchen the wives are baking the fruitcakes, mulling cider, stringing their own popcorn. These people are having a real old-fashioned Christmas. –He's been hitting the egg nog a little early, isn't he?"
[Eddie Albert (Oliver Wendell Douglas) | Vince Barnett (Harry, the Christmas tree salesman)
from Green Acres] |
| 2007-12-12
|
|
(background)
"Aw, phooey with all your sunshine and lollipops. Where I come from Christmas is a nightmare."
[Conrad Vernon (Gingerbread Man)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
"I know all about Christmas, and I have just the book for you: Christmas For Village Idiots."
[Marissa Jaret Winokur (Bookstore Clerk)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
"My mama used to always say, 'Christmas ain't Christmas 'till somebody cries!' Usually that someone's me."
[Eddie Murphy (Donkey)
from Shrek The Halls] |
| 2007-12-11
|
|
(background)
"Happy Yaksmas… and may all your cobs be lumpy ones."
[Billy West (Stimpson J. 'Stimpy' Cat)
from Ren & Stimpy Show, The] |
|
|
"May I ask why you're nailing support hose to the wall? –Why, Ren, don't you know? It's Yaksmas Eve, the shabbiest day of the year! And the longjohns are for Stinky Wizzleteats to put sausages in."
[Billy West (Ren Höek) | Billy West (Stimpson J. 'Stimpy' Cat)
from Ren & Stimpy Show, The] |
|
|
"Hooray! It's Yaksmas Eve! The soot is falling and the air is filled with the scent of roasted rubber band vendors. It's my favorite of the year!"
[Billy West (Stimpson J. 'Stimpy' Cat)
from Ren & Stimpy Show, The] |
| 2007-12-10
|
|
"When a stocking or a dreidel isn't appropriate, give your favorite tyke this hip-hop twist on a holiday classic. –Dr. Seuss meets Dr. Dre in How The Grinch Stole Kwanzaa."
[Jimmy Kimmel (Himself) | Adam Carolla (Himself)
from Man Show, The] |
|
|
"And I'm not religious, I don't have any kids, so for me, Christmas is just a big pre-NFL Playoffs buffet."
[Adam Carolla (Himself)
from Man Show, The] |
|
|
(background)
"Very inappropriate, amigo. Please, allow me."
[Antonio Banderas (Puss In Boots)
from Shrek The Halls] |
| 2007-12-07
|
|
(background)
"Let's go to the ham! (drum roll) Holy crap." (from Virgin Mobile)
[uncredited
from Commercials] |
|
|
"Mmm. Chrismahanukwanzakahlicious." (from Virgin Mobile)
[uncredited
from Commercials] |
|
|
"It's a Chrismahanukwanzah miracle!" (from Virgin Mobile)
[uncredited
from Commercials] |
| 2007-12-06
|
|
(background)
"He could give lessons to Scrooge."
[Loren Lester (Dick Grayson / Robin)
from Batman: The Animated Series] |
|
|
"The Joker's escaped from Arkham Asylum, Robin. –And you really think he's going to make his move on Christmas Eve? Even scum spend the holidays with their families. –He has no family."
[Kevin Conroy (Bruce Wayne / Batman) | Loren Lester (Dick Grayson / Robin)
from Batman: The Animated Series] |
|
|
"Come on, Batman, it's Christmas Eve. Let's kick back and get into the spirit."
[Loren Lester (Dick Grayson / Robin)
from Batman: The Animated Series] |
| 2007-12-05
|
|
(background)
"This is SCTV, your Christmas comedy network."
[uncredited (announcer)
from SCTV] |
|
|
"There's nothing like decorating a tree to get you in that holiday spirit. –Oh, will you knock it off with your spirit, already?"
[Beverly Archer (Iola Lucille Boyland) | Vicki Lawrence (Mrs. Thelma 'Mama' Crowley Harper)
from Mama's Family] |
|
|
"As far as I'm concerned, Christmas is canceled."
[Vicki Lawrence (Mrs. Thelma 'Mama' Crowley Harper)
from Mama's Family] |
| 2007-12-04
|
|
"I can wait by myself, Daddy. –Well, I did want to exchange this present. You sure you don't mind waiting alone? –Daddy, I'm 6-years-old."
[Susan Olsen (Cindy Brady) | Robert Reed (Mike Brady)
from Brady Bunch, The] |
|
|
(background)
"Oh, please, Santa. It's all I want for Christmas."
[Susan Olsen (Cindy Brady)
from Brady Bunch, The] |
|
|
"And wait'll you see what Santa's bringing you!"
[Susan Olsen (Cindy Brady)
from Brady Bunch, The] |
| 2007-12-03
|
|
"There's only 51 days left till Christmas! Now you need to get your big green butt in gear and go get your marshmallows. Because everybody knows without marshmallows, sweet potatoes are nothing!"
[Eddie Murphy (Donkey)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
"You know there's only 159 days left till Christmas, so you better be good!"
[Eddie Murphy (Donkey)
from Shrek The Halls] |
|
|
(background)
"I have shamed myself."
[Antonio Banderas (Puss In Boots)
from Shrek The Halls] |
