December 2000 Archives

2000-12-30 Movie Happy Millennium's End! It's a Strange Days Weekend!
"Have you ever jacked-in? Have you ever wire-tripped?" [Ralph Fiennes (Lenny Nero) from Strange Days]
Movie "You're on the air, Lori. –If you read the Bible, Mark, you'd know that there won't be another 1000 years. Right now we're in the Last Days as foretold in the book of Revelations. –Last Days? You mean the coming of the Apocalypse, right? The Rapture. –You only have to look at the signs. There are wars and rumors of wars. –Now just so the rest of us know how much time is left, when is the Rapture supposed to hit exactly? Is it midnight New Year's Eve? –That's right. –Uh-huh. Is that midnight L.A. time or Eastern Standard Time or what? I mean, what Time Zone is God in anyway? –I pray for you all." [Chris Douridas (Talk Radio Host (voice)) | Lisa Picotte (Lori from Encino (voice)) from Strange Days]
Movie "Well I'm certainly in the mood for a party." [Juliette Lewis (Faith Justin) from Strange Days]
Movie "Go on, man, cheer up. The world's gonna end in 10 minutes anyway." [Tom Sizemore (Max Peltier) from Strange Days]
Movie (background) "This is not the way I wish to be remembered." [Sir John Gielgud (Hobson) from Arthur]
2000-12-29 Television "I can't be bothered with all this. Life's too short." [Leonard Rossiter (Reginald Iolanthe Perrin) from Fall and Rise Of Reginald Perrin, The]
Television (background) "During our lifetime, we travel many roads." [Don Knotts (Deputy Barney Fife) from Andy Griffith Show, The]
2000-12-28 Movie In Memoriam: Jason Robards
"Are you blackmailing me, you ambitious shit?" [Jason Robards (Congressman Phillip Hammersley) from Enemy of the State]
Television (background) "Thufferin' thuccatash!" [Mel Blanc (Sylvester) from Looney Tunes]
Television "It sounds like it's having an hallucinogenic effect. Not like a drug which is harmful and wrong and just say no, kids, but spacey nonetheless." [Gregg Berger (Cornfed Pig) from Duckman: Private Dick/Family Man]
Movie In Memoriam, Billy Barty
"I will consult the bones!" [Billy Barty (High Aldwin) from Willow]
2000-12-27 Movie (background) "How do you feel?" [uncredited (Vulcan Computer) from Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home]
Television "Message coming in, sir." [Nichelle Nichols (Uhura) from Star Trek: The Animated Series]
2000-12-26 Television (background) "The best way to take our minds off the smell of burning flesh is to begin tonight's karaoke contest!" [uncredited (Emcee) from Duckman: Private Dick/Family Man]
Movie "I'm not in the habit of throwing kerosene on a fire." [John Wayne (Wil Andersen) from The Cowboys]
2000-12-25 Movie "Have you ever noticed that everything seems wonderful at Christmas, hmm?" [Jerry Nelson (Ghost of Christmas Present) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
Movie "Merry Christmas, movie house! Merry Christmas, Emporium! Merry Christmas, you wonderful old Building & Loan!" [Jimmy Stewart (George Bailey) from It's A Wonderful Life]
2000-12-23 Movie "'Merry Christmas,' you say. What right have you to be merry? You're poor enough. –What right have you to be dismal? You're rich enough." [Michael Caine (Ebenezer Scrooge) | Steven Mackintosh (Fred, Scrooge's Nephew) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
Radio "Hello, everybody, this is William Shatner. And a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. –Hi, this is George Takei from Star Trek wishing all beings on all planets a Merry Christmas and a Warp Speed New Year. –Hi, this is Jonathan Frakes from Star Trek: The Next Generation wishing the entire universe a Happy Holiday Season. –And if I'm going to tell you one thing, I'm going to tell you this: have a safe and Happy New Year and Christmas, but don't drink and drive. Do one or the other." [William Shatner | George Takei | Jonathan Frakes from IDs, Christmas]
Television "That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown." [Christopher Shea (Linus Van Pelt) from Charlie Brown Christmas, A]
Television "Welcome, Christmas, bring your cheer. Cheer to all Whos far and near. Christmas Day is in our grasp so long as we have hands to clasp." [Boris Karloff (Narrator) from How The Grinch Stole Christmas!]
Movie "If you're really Santa Claus, you can get it for me. And if you can't, you're only a nice man with a white beard like mother says." [Natalie Wood (Susan Walker) from Miracle on 34th Street]
Television "Daddy? –Yes, sugar? –Is it true that if you're a bad little kid Santa Claus'll give you a lump of coal instead of presents? –Sure is, pumpkin." [Tress MacNeille (Angelica Pickles) | Michael Bell (Andrew 'Drew' Pickles) from Rugrats]
2000-12-22 Movie "God bless us, every one." [Jerry Nelson (Robin (Tiny Tim Crachit)) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
Radio (background) "Hi, this is Pete Townsend. I want to wish you Happy Holidays." [Pete Townsend from IDs, Christmas]
Movie "You see, George, you really had a wonderful life. Don't you see what a mistake it would be to throw it away?" [Henry Travers (Clarence) from It's A Wonderful Life]
2000-12-21 Movie "You sit around here and you spin your little webs and you think the whole world revolves around you and your money. Well, it doesn't, Mr. Potter. In the-- In the whole vast configuration of things, I'd say you were nothing but a scurvy little spider." [Jimmy Stewart (George Bailey) from It's A Wonderful Life]
Television (background) "Hey, wait a minute! You're not the real Santa Claus!" [Tress MacNeille (Angelica Pickles) from Rugrats]
Television "When I was a kid, Christmas was always kind of disappointing. The best gift I ever got was a rubber glove and a tongue depressor." [Michael Bell (Charles 'Chaz' Finster, Sr.) from Rugrats]
2000-12-20 Television (background) "(fart) Oww! –Hey, he's like Rudolph!" [Trey Parker (Eric Cartman) | Mary Kay Bergman (Wendy Testaberger) from South Park]
Movie "All my life I've wondered something, and now's my chance to find out. I'm going to find the answer to a question that's puzzled the world for centuries. Does Santa Claus sleep with his whiskers outside or in? –Always sleep with them out. Cold air makes them grow." [John Payne (Fred Gailey) | Edmund Gwenn (Kris Kringle) from Miracle on 34th Street]
Television "All out for Elf Practice!" [Carl Banas (Head Elf) from Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer]
2000-12-19 Movie "I can remember nearly 1900 years. I am the Ghost of Christmas Past." [Jessica Fox (Ghost of Christmas Past) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
Movie "Christmas is a very busy time for us, Mr. Cratchit. People preparing feasts, giving parties, spending the mortgage money on frivolities. One might say that December is the foreclosure season. Harvest time for the money-lenders." [Michael Caine (Ebenezer Scrooge) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
2000-12-18 Radio (background) "This is Yoko Ono wishing Happy Christmas and a Great New Year." [Yoko Ono from IDs, Christmas]
Television (background) "I'll drink a couple of quarts of eggnog and fall asleep in front of the TV!" [David Doyle (Louis 'Grandpa' Pickles) from Rugrats]
Television In Memoriam, Milton Berle
"(sleigh bells ringing constantly) Christmas, when peace and good fellowship-- thank you, tha-that's all, thank you... When peace and good fellowship-- that's enough with the bells, thank you. It's over, thank you. Peace and good fellow-- (whistle) Knock off! Peace and-- OK! (gunshot)" [Milton Berle (Himself) from Milton Berle Show, The]
Television "On this Christmas Eve, I just want to say watch out for drunk drivers. And don't pick up anybody who might puke in your cab!" [Danny DeVito (Louie De Palma) from Taxi]
2000-12-15 Television "You see, Santa Claus doesn't need any steps, honey. He--He--He--When he comes, he brings the North Pole with him and he slides down like a fireman." [Lucille Ball (Lucy Ricardo) from I Love Lucy]
Television (background) "You'd better be nice to me if you want your stocking stuffed." [Jane Curtin (Dr. Mary Albright) from 3rd Rock From The Sun]
Radio "Christmas means glittering lights, gaily wrapped gifts… that's right, sounds of laughter and good cheer. To the folks at (laughing) Preparation H (laughter), it means a time to pause for a (chortle) a few moments to-- (laughter)." [Gary Owens (Himself) from Owens, Gary]
Television "Rats. Nobody sent me a Christmas card today. I almost wish there weren't a holiday season. I know nobody likes me. Why do we have to have a holiday season to emphasize it?" [Peter Robbins (Charlie Brown) from Charlie Brown Christmas, A]
Movie "(bell rings) Look, daddy! Teacher says every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings. –That's right. That's right. Atta boy, Clarence." [Karolyn Grimes (Zuzu Bailey) | Jimmy Stewart (George Bailey) from It's A Wonderful Life]
Movie "Now wait a minute, Susie. Just because every child can't get his wish that doesn't mean there isn't a Santa Claus." [Edmund Gwenn (Kris Kringle) from Miracle on 34th Street]
Television "A toy is never truly happy until it is loved by a child." [Stan Francis (King Moonracer) from Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer]
2000-12-14 Movie (background) "Are you the spirit whose coming was foretold to me?" [Michael Caine (Ebenezer Scrooge) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
Television "I must stop Christmas from coming." [Boris Karloff (The Grinch) from How The Grinch Stole Christmas!]
Movie "But--But maybe he's only a little crazy like painters or composers or… or some of those men in Washington." [Philip Tonge (Julian Shellhammer) from Miracle on 34th Street]
Television "My fellow Americans, our long national nightmare is over. Our Constitution works. Our great Republic is a government of laws and not of men. Here, the people rule." (August 9, 1974) [Gerald R. Ford from Presidents]
2000-12-13 Radio "Hey, pigs! I'm Judy Tenuta, the petite flower and Love Goddess! Ooh, I want a love slave, that's right. Merry Christmas to all you love beasts! And to prove it's Christmas, you must be a giver! Therefore, you should give me all your worldly possessions. It could happen." [Judy Tenuta from IDs, Christmas]
Television "Just my luck! I get a whole bunch of toys and not one of them is any fun!" [Tress MacNeille (Angelica Pickles) from Rugrats]
Television (background) "Now, this won't hurt a bit." [Paul Soles (Hermey) from Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer]
2000-12-12 Movie "(blowing) Ooh! Ooh! I fell down the chimney and landed on a flaming hot goose! (blowing) –You have all the fun." [Steve Whitmire (Rizzo the Rat) | Dave Goelz (The Great Gonzo) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
Radio (background) "Hi, this is Bill Cosby. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year." [Bill Cosby from IDs, Christmas]
Movie "(bottle slams on bar top) That does it! Out you two pixies go, through da door or out da winda!" [Sheldon Leonard (Nick Martini) from It's A Wonderful Life]
2000-12-11 Television "I want to say that if you haven't sent out your Christmas cards yet, it's time. Everywhere you see everyone's looking for a mailbox. I stopped on the corner of Hollywood and Vine tonight for a minute and four people dropped letters in my mouth." [Bob Hope (Himself) from Hope, Bob]
Radio (background) "Hello, this is Bill Murray. I hope you have a Merry Christmas, a Happy Chanukah, a Happy New Year, and a Happy Groundhog Day." [Bill Murray from IDs, Christmas]
Movie "It's Christmas Eve. It's-it's the one night of the year when we all act a little nicer, we-we-we smile a little easier, we-w-w-we-we-we cheer a little more... for a couple of hours out of the whole year we are the people that we always hoped we would be." [Bill Murray (Frank Cross) from Scrooged]
2000-12-09 Television In Memoriam, Werner Klemerer
"Dismissed." [Werner Klemperer (Col. Wilhelm Klink) from Hogan's Heroes]
Movie "Humbug." [Michael Caine (Ebenezer Scrooge) from Muppet Christmas Carol, The]
Radio (background) "Hello, everybody, this is Winona Ryder wishing you and your family a Happy Holiday." [Winona Ryder from IDs, Christmas]
Movie "(bell rings) Somebody's just made it. –Made what? –Every time you hear a bell rings it means that some angel's just got his wings." [Henry Travers (Clarence) | Jimmy Stewart (George Bailey) from It's A Wonderful Life]
Television "I don't get it. We've looked everywhere. –It's hard to find the meanie of Chanukah." [Elizabeth 'E. G.' Daily (Tommy Pickles) | Kath Soucie (Phillip 'Phil' Deville) from Rugrats]
Television "Who ever heard of a skinny Santa? Eat. Eat!" [Peg Dixon (Mrs. Claus) from Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer]
2000-12-08 Radio (background) "Hi, this is David Bowie wishing you a Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year." [David Bowie from IDs, Christmas]
Television "There isn't an animal who works harder this time of year than reindeer." [Noel McNeal (Bear) from Bear In The Big Blue House]
Television "Feliz Navidad. That means 'Merry Christmas' in Spanish. Say it, Feliz Navidad. –Feliz Naviblah. –Feliz Navidad. –Feliz Naviblah. –Feliz Navidad. –Feliz Naviblah." [Vic Trevino (Himself) | Paul Reubens (Pee-Wee Herman) from Pee-Wee's Playhouse]
2000-12-07 Television (background) "Howdy-Ho!" [Trey Parker (Mr. Hankey) from South Park]
Television "Well, sir, someday I'd like to be a... a dentist." [Paul Soles (Hermey) from Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer]
Television "Ah, well, such is the life of an elf." [Burl Ives (Sam the Snowman) from Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer]
2000-12-06 Radio (background) "Hi, I'm Robin Leach with those champagne wishes and caviar dreams wishing you and yours a very rewarding Christmas and a fabulously famous New Year." [Robin Leach from IDs, Christmas]
Television "Look, Charlie, let's face it. We all know that Christmas is a big commercial racket. It's run by a big eastern syndicate, you know." [Tracy Stratford (Lucy Van Pelt) from Charlie Brown Christmas, A]
Movie "Yeah, there's a lot of bad 'isms' floatin' around this world, but one of the worst is commercialism. Make a buck, make a buck. Even in Brooklyn it's the same--don't care what Christmas stands for, just make a buck, make a buck." [Alvin Greenman (Alfred) from Miracle on 34th Street]
2000-12-05 Movie "We have no chimney in our house, which all us kids regret... –So on Christmas Eve we hang our socks on the television set." [Larry Fine | Moe Howard from 3 Stooges, The]
Radio (background) "Howdy, I'm Adam West wishing you a Merry Christmas." [Adam West from IDs, Christmas]
Movie "Ohh, there must be some easier way for me to get my wings." [Henry Travers (Clarence) from It's A Wonderful Life]
2000-12-04 Television "We begged my mother for a Christmas tree, she called it a Chanukah Bush. P.S., the candles from the Menorah set the flocking on fire, and the fumes put my father into the emergency room." [Fran Drescher (Fran Fine) from Nanny, The]
Radio (background) "Hi, this is Vanna White, and I want to wish you a very happy Holiday season." [Vanna White from IDs, Christmas]
Television "I love Christmas. Wilbur is so full of the spirit of giving, and I'm so full of the spirit of receiving." [Allan Lane (Mister Ed) from Mister Ed]
2000-12-02 Television "I am the official sentry of the Island of Misfit Toys." [Alfie Scopp (Charlie-In-The-Box) from Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer]
Movie "We're going to have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny-fucking-Kaye!" [Chevy Chase (Clark Wilhelm Griswold, Jr.) from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation]
Radio (background) "Hi, this is Leslie Nielsen. Merry Christmas you egg-nog-sucking patsies." [Leslie Nielsen from IDs, Christmas]
Television "Where's that big glass star I told you to pack away last Christmas? –You mean that shiny one with the three points on it? –That star has five points. –Well, it went down two points this last year." [Jack Benny (Himself) | Eddie 'Rochester' Anderson (Rochester Van Jones) from Jack Benny Program, The]
Television "I just can't go out there tonight. I've had it; I'm through! Why do I have to climb down the chimney? Why--Why can't I walk in the front door like anybody else? It's discrimination." [Paul Lynde from Andy Griffith Show, The]
2000-12-01 Television "All I want is what I have coming to me. All I want is my fair share." [Kathy Steinberg (Sally Brown) from Charlie Brown Christmas, A]
Movie "I believe, I believe. It's silly, but I believe." [Natalie Wood (Susan Walker) from Miracle on 34th Street]
Movie (background) "The point is, ladies and gentlemen, that greed, for lack of a better word, is good." [Michael Douglas (Gordon Gekko) from Wall Street]